“I’m still here. I’m still here, Ash.”, he whispered over me, broken and weeping wrapped up in his arms, overwhelmed at the thought of what’s to come. Jesse and I have known each other since we were children. I moved to his hometown at 9 years old. We started dating in high school. We’ve been integrated into each other’s lives for so long that my life, my memories, no longer exist apart from him. I cannot describe the depth of sorrow I feel at just the thought of him not being here. It’s like I’m drowning in the open air.
Still, in ways only God can orchestrate, the grieving days are also the rejoicing ones. Some time ago, after losing my Peepaw to pancreatic cancer, I put pencil to paper and I wrote, as I often do. Today, pieces of it have been drifting into my mind, reminding me that God is as faithful to me now as He was then. I’m attaching a link to it for you all. If you’re grieving today, if your soul feels shrouded in darkness and you can’t see through the blurriness of tears, read it. I hope you will find, as I have today, that God is there with you in your grief. And just like my husband, who cradled me in his arms and whispered hope and strength into my shattered heart, God is still here. He is still here.