We sat at a piano in the lobby of the hotel this morning where we are currently staying while awaiting surgery, and Jesse led us to the throne of grace in worship. He struggles to speak sometimes. He struggles to read, too. Last night, he read this blog unassisted for the first time since... Continue Reading →

I used to worry about cancer in the darkness and quietness of night. Hearing the word itself was enough to send my thoughts whirling in the direction of a thousand unknowns. Now, walking alongside it, it's more like we're holding hands and walking cautiously through a thick forest trying to find its home and mine... Continue Reading →

 In Jesse's own words: "I think if God took this tumor quickly, I'd be sad...I don't want him to take this tumor if it's better to have it...I think He wants me to have it, to walk this road...I want my four kids to know that you follow God no matter what. That if you... Continue Reading →

I'm feeling a bit speechless this morning. A unique numbness of sorts. We've been able to sleep a good bit today after being moved from the ICU to a regular floor just for neurology patients. There are less monitors and less interruptions in this room, and we have a door so we can shut off... Continue Reading →

People keep telling me how strong I am. "Strong?", I think. "Me? Strong? No way."A war rages within my soul 100% of the time. I've barely slept, barely eaten, barely left his side. I'm so overwhelmed in every moment. I'm afraid to hope for healing, because I'm afraid I won't be able to handle it... Continue Reading →

A steady stream of doctors and nurses keep coming in and asking him basic questions. "Can you tell me your name?" "2-13-81" "Ok, sir, but can you tell me your name?" "My name?" He rolls his head and fixes his gaze on mine: "What are they asking me?" "They want your name, babe. What is your... Continue Reading →

I was supposed to be in my bed last night, snuggled up close to my husband after two weeks away. Instead, I was sitting awkwardly in a hospital recliner, pressed as close to his hospital bed as I could get. My husband has a brain tumor. A brain tumor. A tumor. No matter how many times... Continue Reading →