Chasing the bright spots

I’ll make this brief-ish because this has been the Monday of all Mondays, and we are in desperate need of a good meal and a long sleep.

We learned on Friday that insurance had denied Jesse’s surgery. We began the fight with them then, which has continued onward today.

It’s complex (and actually pretty boring), but, at the end of the day, the surgery was still denied and we were told we would have to front the cost in order to have the surgery. That conversation went REALLY well. 😏:

Lady on the phone: “Mrs. McMillan? The cost of the surgery will be $99,900. Do you have that amount?”

Me, laughing: “Of course not! Do YOU have 99 thousa…WHO HAS THAT LAYING AROUND?!😂

Her: Ma’am? What do you want to do? Do you want to cancel the surgery?”

Me: “Well, we’re about to meet with the surgeon to review my husband’s new scans, so I’ll have to call you back about that.We’ll figure something out. He can’t just not have life-saving surgery.”

I was following Jesse into the small review room as I finished this conversation. We sat down in our usual places and waited for the doctor to enter. We love our surgeon. He’s good humored, knowledgeable, and has the kind of bedside manner that makes you want to introduce him to your family as your new best friend. He came in, took his seat, and pulled up the new scans.

And that’s when we saw it….or rather, didn’t see it.

Y’all. *Please do take a moment to dramatically pause with me before you continue on reading*

What looked like tumor growth is most likely a system of tiny veins. Veins. Not tumor. Veins. VEINS. AND, compared to his last scans at MDA in March 2017, his tumor looks markedly, remarkably, obviously…regressed. He does not need surgery tomorrow, because there isn’t any tumor on his right side to burn with the laser surgery.

We are always “chasing the bright spots” here, looking for the bright white flecks in a sea of grey in Jesse’s scans that indicate tumor growth;and, looking for the bright Light of Jesus in every darkened space. Today, unexpectedly, we have found ourselves blinded by the glow of the joy that comes from being granted reprieve in a life so often chaotic, a brilliantly shining reminder of the glorious Hope we have in Jesus. It’s just a glimpse, just a reflection, just a tiny little blip of joy compared to life eternal with Him. But, Oh! Is there ever joy!!

This is certainly not the end of brain cancer in our world. It isn’t. The reality is, these tumors tend to grow and spread and make a mess of the structured human brain. BUT. They lack the capability of destroying the purpose of God, who intricately, intentionally, wove Jesse’s brain in this way for His purposes. And we trust Him. We trust Him so deeply. No matter the path we take in this life, we choose Christ. Our greatest hope is that you who find yourselves on this journey with us choose Him, too. You will surely not regret it.

Rejoice with us today, friends! We have such good news to celebrate!!

24 thoughts on “Chasing the bright spots

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  1. I know your are very happy at this time. Praise God, he is not ready for Jesse’s story to end but to continue to praise him and spread his word. God Bless all of you


  2. We are praising God with y’all for this good news! We are continuing to pray for Jesse and your family. God is so good!! God Bless y’all!


  3. I could not get through this without crying, Ashley. Joyful crying. I was reading it to Tom, and he just kept saying, “Awesome! Awesome!” And He is. God is Awesome. We rejoice with you and give praise to our God for your good news today!


  4. Wow – praise God! Y’all have fought so hard and so well and been a picture of trust in our Lord for so many. Keep fighting and we are fighting with you!


  5. Oh, Ashley, we’ve been celebrating this miracle God has chosen to grant for all to see, and we’re looking forward to His next move in the lives of you all! I got to hear the sermon of the 8th and I can’t begin to tell you what I felt as I listened…. twice! And probably will again! What a testimony you have, and that’s just for now…. only God knows the “rest of the story”🙏💕granny lee

    Sent from my iPhone



  6. I was totally blessed to hear of your MIRACLE today God bless you and your family. Will continue to keep you in my prayers.


  7. This is AMAZING! We rejoice with you and praise God for his provision. Thank you for sharing and always pointing the way to the Savior. You all are an inspiration.


  8. I too have tears of joy and the sense that complete I repeat complete, miraculous healing has begun! Thank you Jesus!


  9. Oh my! I was recommended to your site by a friend, Mandy, as an excellent example of blog writing. I feel like you invited me in. I’m privileged to begin praying for the bright spots in your journey and follow you forward.


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